# Give me coffee and no one gets hurt.
# Don't wash this vehicle - Undergoing scientific dirt test
# Cover me. I'm changing lanes.
# Keep honking, I'm reloading
# He who laughs last thinks slowest

# Is reading in the bathroom considered Multi-Tasking?
# You must be from the shallow end of the gene pool.
# I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
# You're Just Jealous Because The Voices Are Talking To Me
# Jesus is coming, everyone look busy
# Your College Sucks
# I Refuse To Have A Battle Of Wits With An Unarmed Person
# The Earth Is Full - Go Home
# As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public schools
# My kid had sex with your honor student.
# Your kid may be an honor student but you're still an IDIOT!
# I is a college student
# I souport publik edekasion
# If you think education is expensive, Try ignorance
# Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an idiot.
# You! Out Of The Gene Pool!
# The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
# I took an IQ test and the results were negative.
# Why drink and drive, when you can smoke and fly.
# Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot.
# Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.
# If at first you do succeed, try not to look astonished.
# Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
# Some mornings, it's just not worth chewing through the leather straps.
# If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
# Never get into an argument with the schizophrenic person and say, "Just who do you think you are?"
# When she told me I was average, I figured she was just being mean.
# Hire the Handicapped...Were fun to watch!!
# STUPIDITY should be Painful
# This Would Be Really Funny If It Weren't Happening To Me
# Cleverly Disguised As A Responsible Adult
# Lord save me from your followers.
# Jesus loves you... everyone else thinks you're an asshole.
# Atheism is a non-profit organization.
# And on the 8th day, God sobered up.
# The Face Is Familiar But I Can't Quite Remember My Name
# I Do Whatever My Rice Krispies Tell Me To
# It's Been Lovely But I Have To Scream Now
# I Haven't Lost My Mind, It's Backed Up On Disk Somewhere
# A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.
# Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle drugs.
# I killed a 6-pack just to watch it die.
# I said "no" to drugs, but they just wouldn't listen.
# Kill 'em all. Let God sort it out
# Protected by .357 Magnum 3 days a week. You guess which 3