"It is a good thing for an uneducated man to read books of quotations."    — Winston Churchill.

    "Something tells me that they probably screwed up and named Murphy's Law after the wrong guy."    — Doug Finney.

    "Everybody must believe in something.... I believe I'll have another drink."    — Murphy (of Murphy's law fame).

    "enythink thiT ken Go rong willl."    — Morfy's law.

    "A flashlight is a case for holding dead batteries."

    "Danm my spel cheker,"

    "Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, 'Where did I go wrong ?'
    Then a voice says to me, 'This is going to take more than one night'."  ---Charlie Brown

    "You can't fall off the floor."    — Paul's Law.

    "If we see light at the end of the tunnel it is probably the light of an oncoming train.    — Robert Lowell (1917-77), US poet.

    "Everybody lies, but it doesn't matter since nobody listens."

    "Virtue is its own punishment."

    "If the shoe fits, it's ugly."

    "Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth."    — Erma Bombeck.

    "A closed mouth gathers no feet."