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Random Bumper Sticker Quotes |
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- He who eats to many prunes, sits on toilet many moons.
- Man who run behind car get exhausted.
- Everybody is somebody else's weirdo.
- Man who scratch ass should not bite fingernails.
- You can't hatch chickens from fried eggs.
- Man who fart in church sit in own pew.
- You've got to do your own growing, no matter how tall your grandfather was.
- Life is like a sewer... what you get out of it depends on what you put into it.
- Man who fly plane upside down have crackup.
- Woman who dance while wearing jock strap have make believe ballroom.
- Man who drop watch in toilet bound to have shitty time.
- Woman who ride bicycle in city pedal ass all over town.
- Stand on toilet, get high on pot.
- Man who walk through airport door sideways is going to Bangkok..
- A new broom sweeps clean, but the old brush knows all the corners.
- Support bacteria -- it's the only culture some people have!
- Man who eat jellybean fart in technicolor.
- Everyone is kneaded out of the same dough but not baked in the same oven.
- Experience is a comb which nature gives to men when they are bald.
- Fame is a magnifying glass.
- Friends are like fiddle strings, they must not be screwed too tight.
- A son is a son till he gets him a wife, but a daughter's a daughter the rest of your life.
- A thorn defends the rose, harming only those who would steal the blossom.
- A monkey never thinks her baby's ugly.
- A tree falls the way it leans.
- Advice when most needed is least heeded.
- He who asks is a fool for five minutes, but he who does not ask remains a fool forever.
- 7/5th of all people do not understand fractions.
- He who cannot agree with his enemies is controlled by them.
- He who does not know one thing knows another.
- Kotex not best thing on earth, but next to best thing.
- Man who marries a girl with no bust has right to feel low down.
- Squirrel who runs up woman's leg not find nuts.
- He who fishes in another man's well often catches crab.
- Man who speaks with forked tongue should not kiss balloons.
- Even the greatest of whales is helpless in middle of desert.
- The hand that turneth the knob, opens the door..
- Man who sneezes without hanky takes matters into his own hands.
- Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day.
- Baby conceived on back seat of car with automatic transmission grow up to be shiftless bastard.
- War does not determine who is right, war determine who is left.
- Man who eat prunes get good run for money.
- Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cathouse.
- Virginity like bubble, one prick all gone.
- Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.
- Man with one chopstick go hungry.
- An enemy will agree, but a friend will argue.
- Man who live in glass house should change clothes in basement.
- 43% of all statistics are worthless.
- A bird in the hand is safer than one overhead.
- You can lead a fool to wisdom but you can't make him think.
- Friends are lost by calling often and calling seldom.
- A Wise Man can see more from the bottom of a well than a Fool can see from the top of a mountain.
- The believer is happy. The doubter is wise.
- It takes both sunshine and rain to make a rainbow.
- Anger is a condition in which the tongue works faster than the mind.
- Everything has beauty but not everyone sees it.
- There are no short cuts to any place worth going.
- A girl's best asset is her 'lie'ability.
- You cannot unscramble eggs.
- An error doesn't become a mistake until you refuse to correct it.
- Doubt is the beginning not the end of wisdom.
- A peacock who sits on his tail is just another turkey.
- A society grows great when old men plant trees whose shade they know they shall never sit in.
- Anger is as a stone cast into a wasp's nest.
- Commit a sin twice and it will not seem a crime.
- He who leaps high must take a long run.
- He whose face gives no light, shall never become a star.
- If the patient dies, the doctor has killed him, but if he gets well, the saints have saved him.
- Keep a green tree in your heart and perhaps a singing bird will come.
- Laws control the lesser man. Right conduct controls the greater one.
- Love enters a man through his eyes, woman through her ears.
- More grows in the garden than the gardener knows he has sown.
- No man limps because another is hurt.
- One cannot shoe a running horse.
- A man who thinks too much about his ancestors is like a potato—the best part of him is underground.
- A ship in the harbor is safe, but that is not what ships are built for.
- A closed mouth gathers no feet.
- A prudent man does not make the goat his gardener.
- One generation plants the trees; another gets the shade.
- He who never made a mistake never made a discovery.
- If you are willing to admit faults, you have one less fault to admit.
- You cannot get to the top by sitting on your bottom.
- Anger without power is folly.
- Without vision, we are blind to opportunity.
- A man is not honest simply because he never had a chance to steal.
- A rumor goes in one ear and out many mouths.
- In golf as in life it is the follow through that makes the difference.
- The fellow who never makes a mistake takes his orders from one who does.
- Learn from the mistakes of others. You can't live long enough to make them all yourself.
- The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one.
- It is only those who never do anything who never make mistakes.
- Wise men learn by other men's mistakes, fools by their own.
- Darkness reigns at the foot of the lighthouse.
- Do not look where you fell, but where you slipped.
- Do not use a hatchet to remove a fly from your friend's forehead.
- He who holds the ladder is as bad as the thief.
- Wise men don't need advice. Fools won't take it.
- Many complain of their looks, but none of their brains.
- A book is like a garden carried in the pocket.
- A closed mouth catches no flies.
- A country can be judged by the quality of its proverbs.
- A courtyard common to all will be swept by none.
- If you think education is expensive, try ignorance.
- Practice makes perfect, but nobody's perfect, so why practice?
- Silence is one of the most effective forms of communication.
- You may only be one person to the world, but you may also be the world to one person.
- Choose a job you like and you will never have to work a day of your life.
- You can discover more about a person in an hour of play than in a year of conversation.
- The secret of getting ahead is getting started.
- Happiness is not a state to arrive at, but a manner of travelling.
- May today be better than yesterday, but, not as good as tomorrow.
- If you choose not to decide - you still have made a choice.
- The best way to predict the future is to invent it.
- No one is rich enough to do without a neighbor.
- If you want your eggs hatched, sit on them yourself.
- The nail that sticks up will be hammered down.
- Make happy those who are near, and those who are far will come.
- Question Authority and the Authorities will question You.
- A company is known by the people it keeps.
- A person who can't lead and won't follow makes a dandy roadblock.
- It takes one tree to make 10,000 matches, but one match to burn 10,000 trees.
- Poor planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part.
- Quitters never win, and winners never quit, but those who never quit AND never win are idiots.
- People who do the world's real work don't usually wear neckties.
- Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.
- The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.
- A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer.
- Make it too tough for the enemy to get in and you can't get out.
- If it's stupid but works, it isn't stupid.
- A drowning man is not troubled by rain.
- A fool sees not the same tree that a wise man sees.
- A hedge between keeps friendship green.
- Politics is a rotten egg; if broken, it stinks.
- Some people are masters of money, and some its slaves.
- Speak the truth, but leave immediately after.
- The night rinses what the day has soaped.
- The reverse side also has a reverse side.
- The road to a friend's house is never long.
- When you live next to the cemetery you cannot weep for everyone.
- Who begins too much accomplishes little.
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