A couple of buddies ran into each other at the 19th hole one afternoon. One of the men had a large bandage wrapped around his throat and could speak no louder than a hoarse whisper. Needless to say, the other was quite curious and demanded the details of what had happened.

   1.  The score a player reports on any hole should be regarded as his opening offer.
   2. When your shot has to carry over a water hazard, you can either hit one more club or two more balls.

An avid golfer got married, and the marriage was getting into problems as he was playing golf 5 days a week. They finally talked about it and she asks him if he could teach her golf, that way they can both enjoy golf and improve their marriage.

A golfer goes into the pro shop and looks around frowning. Finally the pro askes him what he wants. ``I can't find any green golf balls,'' the golfer replies.