Laloo becomes PM (if you haven’t cut your throat yet, read on) and goes to Pakistan for a one-on-one with Nawaz Sharif. They decide to meet without aides and are closeted for about 5 minutes. Laloo then emerges from the room. Reporters clamor for a statement.

“Nawazbhai will make the announcement.” is all Laloo will say. Nawaz Sharif comes out and drops a bombshell - Pakistan has decided to give up all claims on Kashmir, with no strings attached.

The world is stunned.

Laloo has achieved in 5 minutes what others had failed to in 50 years! How did you do it, what did you promise, the press clamours. “Sab AKAI - waalon ka kamaal hai,” says Laloo. “Who kehte hain na, TV loge to fridge doonga, video khareedein to cellphone free… to hum bhi Nawazbhai se kehe diye: “Aapko Kashmir chaahiye na? Le jaayie. Magar saath mein Bihar free milega, bas!”