A young ensign had nearly completed his first overseas tour of sea duty when he was given an opportunity to display his ability at getting the ship under way. With a stream of crisp commands, he had the decks buzzing with men. The ship steamed out of the channel and soon the port was far behind.

This is an actual radio conversation released by the Chief of Naval Operations, 10-10-95, MSG#H0000115020ecb52EMHS:

#1: "Please divert your course 15 degrees to the north to avoid a collision."

On the night of graduation, a father approached his son and asked him,  "Son, now that you finished high school, what are you going to do with your life?"

The son replied, "I think I am going to join the peace corps."

An American soldier, serving in World War II, had just returned from several weeks of intense action on the German front lines. He had finally been granted R&R and was on a train bound for London.